continuousconfusion

A message for the poor !

2011-02-15T10:14:00.000+05:30

redwine and tequila - in new bottles..!

2011-02-04T13:11:00.000+05:30

An obituary to Common sense !

2011-02-02T17:25:00.001+05:30

Interesting and sadly rather true.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who had been with us for many years.

No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

     - Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Life isn't always fair;
- and maybe it was my fault.

   Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies

        -(don't spend more than you can earn) and

   -reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

    His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned
        but overbearing regulations were set in place.

     Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate;
         teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch;
         and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student,only worsened his condition.

    Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that
        they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

    It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to
    administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student;but could not inform parents when a
    student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion..

   Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses;and
       criminals received better treatment than their victims.

   Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar
       in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

   Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize
       that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was
       promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust,by his
      wife, Discretion,by his daughter, Responsibility,and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;

I Know My Rights
I Want It Now
Someone Else Is To Blame
I'm A Victim

Not many attended his funeral

because so few realized he was gone.

If you still remember him, pass this on by sharing this.....

If not, join the majority and do nothing.

Courtesy : the London Times

Salutes India !!!

2011-01-27T18:45:00.000+05:30

The real language of Indianness doesn't know any language at all ! How I hope this video made the 'able' ones think more and then talk less !!!

Shubh Navratri !

2010-10-15T18:57:00.000+05:30

God Bless all !

Driving in India- A Hilarious Account ..!

2010-10-12T18:49:00.000+05:30

As written by a Dutch man ( supposedly ) who visited India years back...

I visited Mumbai recently and agree with the observations about driving. For the benefit of every Tom, Dick and Harry visiting India and daring to drive on Indian roads, I am offering a few hints for survival. They are applicable to every place in India except Bihar, where life outside a vehicle is only marginally safer.

Indian road rules broadly operate within the domain of karma where you do your best and leave the results to your insurance company.

The hints are as follows:

Do we drive on the left or right of the road? The answer is "both". Basically you start on the left of the road, unless it is occupied. In that case, go to the right, unless that is also occupied. Then proceed by occupying the next available gap, as in chess.....

1. Just trust your instincts, ascertain the direction, and proceed. Adherence to road rules leads to much misery and occasional fatality.

2. Most drivers don't drive, but just aim their vehicles in the intended direction. Don't you get discouraged or underestimate yourself. Except for a belief in reincarnation, the other drivers are not in any better position.

3. Don't stop at pedestrian crossings just because some fool wants to cross the road. You may do so only if you enjoy being bumped in the back. Pedestrians have been strictly instructed to cross only when traffic is moving slowly or has come to a dead stop because some minister is in town. Still some idiot may try to wade across, but then, let us not talk ill of the dead.

4. Blowing your horn is not a sign of protest as in some countries. We horn to express joy, resentment, frustration, romance and bare lust (two brisk blasts) or just to mobilize a dozing cow in the middle of the bazaar.

5. Keep informative books in the glove compartment. You may read them during traffic jams, while awaiting the chief minister's motorcade, or waiting for the rain waters to recede when over-ground traffic meets underground drainage.

6. Night driving on Indian roads can be an exhilarating experience (for those with the mental makeup of Genghis Khan). In a way, it is like playing Russian roulette, because you do not know who amongst the drivers is loaded. What looks like premature dawn on the horizon turns out to be a truck attempting a speed record. On encountering it, just pull partly into the field adjoining the road until the phenomenon passes.

Indian roads do not have shoulders, but occasional boulders. Do not blink your lights expecting reciprocation. The only dim thing in the truck is the driver and the peg of illicit arrack he has had at the last stop; his total cerebral functions add up to little more than a naught. Truck drivers are the James Bonds of India and are licensed to kill...(ahem )

Often you may encounter a single powerful beam of light about six feet above the ground. This is not a super motorbike, but a truck approaching you with a single light on, usually the left one. It could be the right one, but never get too close to investigate. You may prove your point posthumously. Of course, all this occurs at night, on the trunk roads.

During the daytime, trucks are more visible, except that the drivers will never show any signal. (And you must watch for the absent signals; they are a greater threat.) Only, you will often observe that the cleaner that sits next to the driver will project his hand and wave hysterically. This is definitely not to be construed as a signal for a left turn. The waving is just an expression of physical relief on a hot day.

Occasionally you might see what looks like an UFO with blinking colored lights and weird sounds emanating from within. This is an illuminated bus, full of happy pilgrims singing bhajans. These pilgrim buses go at breakneck speed, seeking contact with the Almighty, often meeting with success.

Unique to Indian traffic:

Auto Rickshaw (Baby Taxi)

The result of a collision between a rickshaw and an automobile, this three-wheeled vehicle works on an external combustion engine that runs on a mixture of kerosene oil and creosote. This triangular vehicle carries iron rods, gas cylinders or passengers three times its weight and dimension, at an unspecified fare.

After careful geometric calculations, children are folded and packed into these auto rickshaws until some children in the periphery are not in contact with the vehicle at all. Then their school bags are pushed into the microscopic gaps all round so those minor collisions with other vehicles on the road cause no permanent damage. Of course, the peripheral children are charged half the fare and also learn Newton's laws of motion en route to school. Auto-rickshaw drivers follow the road rules depicted in the film Ben Hur and are licensed to irritate.

Mopeds

The moped looks like an oil tin on wheels and makes noise like an electric shaver. It runs 30 miles on a teaspoon of petrol and travels at break-bottom speed. As the sides of the road are too rough for a ride, the moped drivers tend to drive in the middle of the road; they would rather drive under heavier vehicles instead of around them and are often "mopped" off the tarmac.

Leaning Tower of Passes

Most bus passengers are given free passes and during rush hours, there is absolute mayhem (hell). There are passengers hanging off other passengers, who in turn hang off the railings and the overloaded bus leans dangerously, defying laws of gravity but obeying laws of surface tension. As drivers get paid for overload (so many Rupees per kg of passenger), no questions are ever asked. Steer clear of these buses by a width of three passengers.

One-way Street

These boards are put up by traffic people to add jest in their otherwise drab lives. Don't stick to the literal meaning and proceed in one direction. In metaphysical terms, it means that you cannot proceed in two directions at once. So drive as you like, in reverse throughout, if you are the fussy type.

Lest I sound hypercritical, I must add a positive point also.

Rash and fast driving in residential areas has been prevented by providing a "speed breaker"; two for each house. This mound, incidentally, covers the water and drainage pipes for that residence and is left un-tarred for easy identification by the corporation authorities, should they want to recover the pipe for year-end accounting.

If, after all this, you still want to drive in India, have your lessons between 8 pm and 11 am - when the police have gone home. The citizen is then free to enjoy the 'FREEDOM OF SPEED' enshrined in the constitution.

Having said all this, isn't it true that the accident rate and related deaths are less in India compared to US or other countries ?

The cow !

2010-08-05T09:07:00.000+05:30

GOI - online...

2010-08-03T15:47:00.001+05:30

Here is a near comprehensive list of all the Govt of India services that are available online...
( thanks to Priyank for the links)

1. Birth Certificate < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=1 > .

2. Caste Certificate < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=4 > .

3. Tribe Certificate < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=8 > .

4. Domicile Certificate < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=5 > .

5. Driving Licence < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=6 > .

6. Marriage Certificate < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=3 > .

7. Death Certificate < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=2 > .

Apply for:

1. PAN Card < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=15 > .

2. TAN Card < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=3 > .

3. Ration Card < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=7 > .

4. Passport < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=2 > .

5. Inclusion of name in the Electoral Rolls < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=10 > .

Register:

1. Land/Property < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=9 > .

2. Vehicle < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=13 > .

3. With State Employment Exchange < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/howdoi.php?service=12 > .

4. As Employer < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=17 > .

5. Company < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=19 > .

6. .IN Domain < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=18 > .

7. GOV.IN Domain < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=25 > .

Check/Track:

1. Waiting list status for Central Government Housing < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=9 > .

2. Status of Stolen Vehicles < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=1 > .

3. Land Records < http://www.india.gov.in/landrecords/index.php > .

4. Cause list of Indian Courts < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=7 > .

5. Court Judgments (JUDIS ) < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=24 > .

6. Daily Court Orders/Case Status < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=21 > .

7. Acts of Indian Parliament < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=13 > .

8. Exam Results < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=16 > .

9. Speed Post Status < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=10 > .

10. Agricultural Market Prices Online < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=6 > .

Book/File/Lodge:

1. Train Tickets Online < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=5 > .

2. Air Tickets Online < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=4 > .

3. Income Tax Returns < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=12 > .

4. Complaint with Central Vigilance Commission (CVC) < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=14 > .

Contribute to:

1. Prime Minister's Relief Fund < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=11 > .

Others:

1. Send Letters Electronically < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/otherservice_details.php?service=20 > .

Recently Added Online Services

1. Tamil Nadu: Online application of marriage certificate for persons having registered their marriages < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2691 > .

2. Tamil Nadu: Online District wise soil Details of Tamil Nadu < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2693 > .

3. Tamil Nadu: View Water shed Atlas of Tamil Nadu < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2694 > .

4. Tamil Nadu: E-Pension District Treasury Tirunelveli < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2695 > .

5. Meghalaya: Search Electoral Roll Online by Name (2008) < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2697 > .

6. Meghalaya: Search Electoral Roll Online by EPIC number (2008) < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2698 > .

7. Meghalaya: Search Electoral Roll Online by House number (2008) < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2699 > .

8. Himachal Pradesh: Revised Pay and Arrears Calculator-Fifth Pay < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2702 > .

9. Meghalaya: Search Electoral Roll Online by Part number (2008) < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2700 > .

10. Andhra Pradesh: Online Motor Driving School Information < http://www.india.gov.in/howdo/onlineservice_detail.php?service=2705 > .

Global Navigation

1. Citizens < http://www.india.gov.in/citizen.php > .

2. Business (External website that opens in a new window) < http://business.gov.in/ > .

3. Overseas < http://www.india.gov.in/overseas.php > .

4. Government < http://www.india.gov.in/govtphp > .

5. Know India < http://www.india.gov.in/knowindia.php > .

6. Sectors < http://www.india.gov.in/sector.php > .

7. Directories < http://www.india.gov.in/directories.php > .

8. Documents < http://www.india.gov.in/documents.php > .

9. Forms < http://www.india.gov.in/forms/forms.php > .

10. Acts < http://www.india.gov.in/govt/acts.php > .

11. Rules < http://www.india.gov.in/govt/rules.php > .

12. Schemes < http://www.india.gov.in/govt/schemes.php > .

13. Tenders < http://www.india.gov.in/tenders.php > .

14. Home < http://www.india.gov.in/default.php > .

15. About the Portal < http://www.india.gov.in/abouttheportal.php > .

16. Site Map < http://www.india.gov.in/sitemap.php > .

17. Link to Us < http://www.india.gov.in/linktous.php > .

18. Suggest to a Friend < http://www.india.gov.in/suggest/suggest.php > .

19. Help < http://www.india.gov.in/help.php > .

20. Terms of Use < http://www.india.gov.in/termscondtions.php > .

21. Feedback < http://www.india.gov.in/feedback.php > .

22. Contact Us < http://www.india.gov.in/contactus.php > .

23. Accessibility Statement < http://www.india.gov.in/accessibilitystatement.php > .

Hail Indian DemocraZy !!!!

2010-07-22T21:50:00.002+05:30

Jyoti Kumari is a symbol of the rot and rascals that rule us.. Far away in Bihar, she but is here and there every where as the misfortune that rules India, making sure that we remain poor, illiterate , impoverished and above all primitive so that every 5 years they can arrive in there Scorpios and Mercs with plastic smiles and beg for votes..

She is a Congress MLC protesting her ouster for what you see here down in the video and this is her form of protest.. How I Hope Gandhi , whom they call the Mahatma , was alive to see what he left of to his protege Nehru has taken this country to...

If I dont get to rule, I will destroy everything, I will hold the people to ransom, I will violate all rules and laws regardless of the fact that my tribe has made over ages ...... that seems to be the motto of our ruler.....

Every time such stuff comes up all the parties shamelessly jump into the fray accusing each other but in the process maintaining a strange unison.. they are all the same, only the people are different be it colour, caste , creed or cost of living that they can encur...

Least I can say .. Hail this great democraZy of ours !!!!

AN Arab son's letter !

2010-07-21T18:45:00.004+05:30

Dear Dad

Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really
like it here, but Dad, I am a bit ashamed to arrive
at my college with my pure-gold Ferrari 599GTB
when all my teachers and many fellow students
travel by train.

Your son, Nasser

The next day, Nasser gets a reply to his e-mail
from his dad:

My dear loving son

Twenty million US Dollar has just been transferred
to your account. Please stop embarrassing us.
Go and get yourself a train too.

Love, your Dad

The new waka waka..

2010-07-20T19:45:00.000+05:30

Too good to be true !!!!

Water closet - funny !

2010-07-15T18:41:00.000+05:30

In the days when you couldn't count on a public toilet facility, an English woman was planning a trip to India . She was registered to stay in a small guest house owned by the local schoolmaster. She was concerned as to whether the guest house contained a WC. In England , as you know, a bathroom is commonly called a WC which stands for "Water Closet". She wrote to the schoolmaster inquiring of the facilities about the WC.

The school master, not fluent in English, asked the local priest if he knew the meaning of WC. Together they pondered possible meanings of the letters and concluded that the lady wanted to know if there was a "Wayside Chapel" (Place where Celebrations are done especially like a beautiful garden) near the house . . . a bathroom never entered their minds.

So the schoolmaster wrote the following reply:

Dear Madam,

I take great pleasure in informing you that the WC is located 9 miles from the house. It is located in the middle of a grove of pine trees, surrounded by lovely grounds. It is capable of holding 229 people and isopen on Sundays and Thursdays. As there are many people expected in the summer months, I suggest you arrive early. There is, however, plenty of standing room. This is an unfortunate situation especially if you are in the habit of going regularly.. It may be of some interest to you that my daughter was married in the WC as it was there that she met her husband. It was a wonderful event. There were 10 people in every seat. It was wonderful to see the expressions on their faces. We can take photos indifferent angle. My wife, sadly, has been ill and unable to go recently. It has been almost a year since she went last, which pains her greatly.

You will be pleased to know that many people bring their lunch and make a day of it. Others prefer to wait till the last minute and arrive just in time. I would recommend Your Ladyship plan to go on a Thursday as there is an organ accompaniment. The acoustics are excellent and even the most delicate sounds can be heard everywhere. The newest addition is a bell which rings every time a person enters. We are holding a bazaar to provide plush seats for all since many feel it is long needed. I look forward to escorting you there myself and seating you in a place where you can be seen by all.

With deepest regards,

The Schoolmaster

Paul the super star ...

2010-07-14T23:04:00.002+05:30

the hand of God - Now...

2010-07-11T09:45:00.003+05:30

This is what the famous hand of god is doing - NOW !!!

All about farts.. !

2010-04-22T20:32:00.003+05:30

Obliged to Dr ManjuLakshmi -a renowned fartolgist and researcher....

Murphy's day out......!!!

2010-04-05T23:07:00.008+05:30

Heavy rains and thunder with dark clouds suddenly looming and this poor guy getting caught in the rain suddenly… My car refused to start and I panicked.. Tried my skills to get the machine run and when failed call up my mechanic who is far away and a bit drunk… tried all the possible rescue numbers and then at last get the 24 hours rescue and emergency team of the most trusted Maruthi dealer in town…

I explain the nature of the problem ( symptoms rather) and after which comes the assurance we are there sir.. in 10 minutes… one hour later and after some 231 thunder and lighting flashes later, I call them and they are still 10 minutes away.. finally a group of three guys (young teens who looked dead tired) arrive and one of them come out, tries his bit, comes out and announces to a waiting me…

It is a break down…

I knew it and hence didn’t find any news value in it…

So… I ask…

Don’t you know any house near by?....He asks…

Why? I get tense again…

No… we don’t have the tools.. the head of the 24 hours emergency and rescue team tells me without a bit of shame…

What you mean?.. I said…

He meant what he said.. they are an awesome threesome who is on a drive on a rainy evening with some other mission… an idiot with his car that got stuck some where on the road is the last of their problems…

You have a rope? He asks me…

I would have asked him whether he is so ashamed that he wanted to commit suicide but didn’t ask ( for obvious reasons)..

Again…. This time almost crying… I ask…. why?

So that we can tie it and take it to your home…
pat comes the seasoned reply...

How will I have a rope my dear…. ? I ask in shock..

He didn’t reply but had it written on his face that those jokers who drive around in cars have to carry at least a rope, big and strong enough to pull your car…
I don’t have a rope.. I take them to IBS where I work, where I know there is a long rope.. we get back , they tie it and then drag the car to my home.. we had almost reached and as I thank Murphy for having stopped his dance, comes the climax….

The rescue car refuses to move… the team try and try and finally they accept defeat.. I pray to Lord Murphy to spare me and let me get back home… the rescue car starts and some how my car is pushed into my car porch…

I try to advise them.. the F*&^%$$ng Marketing Professor that I am…

It is unbelievable that mechanics of your firm couldn’t do this… I guess this is a minor work…

He smiles at me and it flashed more powerful than all the 231 lightning flashes.... he then told me that secret… we are not mechanics sir… we are just trainees.. and I joined just last week…

Amen....I said... !!

Stress and its after effects

2010-03-24T16:20:00.001+05:30

Mayawati- Dalit to Daulat putri

2010-03-17T14:35:00.008+05:30

Even as the noice over the multi-crore garland gifted to BSP chief Mayawati at a rally in Lucknow is up and tonight chat show hosts are yet to debate over it, even as Suhel seth's and Ravi shankar prasad's ( not forgeting Digvijay singh's and Vinod Mehta's) havent yet put on their make up to start for the TV studio's.....an audacious BSP has gifted multi megalomaniac Mayawati with yet another cash garland (this time worth Rs 18 lakh as the notice was just a night and the goons and brigades have to come back to Lucknow with the weekly hafta).... the question that balles is......Now what?

Media reports said."The Opposition has objected to Mayawati's garland and are making it an issue. BSP is very angry about all these allegations being made against Mayawati. We will continue to garland Mayawati with currency note garlands," thundered BSP leader Nasimuddin Siddiqui at a crowded press conference.

I agree with him 200%....In a country where in the name of democracy when we can elect jokers, nincompoops , the haughty , dynastic princes, crooks, nanogenerians and gang lords, why not a Mayawati?

Mayawati should but be appreciated for one thing- nauseating though, her public display of (what other politicians do in secret) wealth that they have (obviously) made through kick backs' hafta and havala, is a shock for others... not for the public at large but for the politician who is now panicking that people will suspect them as well.. after all if a simple UP CM can amass such wealth in small span of time, (the public will start thinking), how much would have the long time rulers (who now speak atop the hills of morality) accumulated in the last 60 years plus? Now that is a question that is making the politician panic..Now the display is vulgar, not the amassing...

Will it be followed up? Will she be made to answer?.......we know the answer and hence the public is just as cool as ever.. We, the average Indian has seen it all...

As of now, the Dalit putri has proved more to be a Daulat putri.....

Two Beer Tales...

2010-03-12T15:36:00.001+05:30

They mean CHILLED BEER .....

and let this not happen with you on a week end !!!

Day light robbery..... Indian school style..

2010-03-03T17:04:00.002+05:30

ultimate illusion...

2010-02-16T11:27:00.002+05:30

Well !! the best as it can get .....

Happy valentines day !

2010-02-14T09:33:00.000+05:30

For all the lovers in this beautiful world !

Games people play !

2010-02-04T15:37:00.003+05:30

Practise is everything !!!

Tatoo of the year !!

2010-01-13T14:59:00.001+05:30

How creative !!!!!!!!!

Organised Crime !

2010-01-11T14:35:00.000+05:30

Modern day Ramayana Comics !

2010-01-06T09:32:00.005+05:30

It's heaven here !!!

2010-01-01T17:35:00.002+05:30

For those who do not understand malayalam, the film poster says "it's heaven here" .... and the rest you can see.... Happy New Year people !!!

A New Year plea !

2010-01-01T09:04:00.000+05:30

Lord, let me stand in the thick of the fight,
Let me bear what I must without whining;
Grant me the wisdom to do what is right,
Though a thousand false beacons are shining.

Let me be true as the steel of a blade,
Make me bigger than skillful or clever;
Teach me to cling to my best, unafraid,
And harken to false gospels, never.

Let me be brave when the burden is great,
Faithful when wounded by sorrow;
Teach me, when troubled, with patience to wait
The better and brighter to-morrow.

Spare me from hatred and envy and shame,
Open my eyes to life's beauty;
Let not the glitter of fortune or fame
Blind me to what is my duty.

Let me be true to myself to the end,
Let me stand to my task without whining;
Let me be right as a man, as a friend,
Though a thousand false beacons are shining.

.....Edgar Guest

Worlds best film dancing !!!

2009-12-30T11:19:00.002+05:30

Wonder who produced and directed the film if it is not the HERO himself !!!

Merry Xmas !!!

2009-12-25T14:49:00.000+05:30

The Dubai Fiasco !

2009-12-21T11:43:00.000+05:30

An Email War !!!

2009-12-07T17:13:00.006+05:30

From: Simon Edhouse

Date: Monday 16 November 2009 2.19pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Logo Design
Hello David,
I would like to catch up as I am working on a really exciting project at the moment and need a logo designed. Basically something representing peer to peer networking. I have to have something to show prospective clients this week so would you be able to pull something together in the next few days? I will also need a couple of pie charts done for a 1 page website. If deal goes ahead there will be some good money in it for you.
Simon
*************************************************
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 3.52pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Logo Design
Dear Simon,
Disregarding the fact that you have still not paid me for work I completed earlier this year despite several assertions that you would do so, I would be delighted to spend my free time creating logos and pie charts for you based on further vague promises of future possible payment. Please find attached pie chart as requested and let me know of any changes required.

Regards, David.

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 4.11pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Logo Design

Is that supposed to be a fucking joke? I told you the previous projects did not go ahead. I invested a lot more time and energy in those projects than you did. If you put as much energy into the projects as you do being a dickhead you would be a lot more successful.
*************************************************
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 5.27pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Dear Simon,
You are correct and I apologise. Your last project was actually both commercially viable and original. Unfortunately the part that was commercially viable was not original, and the part that was original was not commercially viable.
I would no doubt find your ideas more ‘cutting edge’ and original if I had traveled forward in time from the 1950’s but as it stands, your ideas for technology based projects, that have already been put into application by other people several years before you thought of them, fail to generate the enthusiasm they possibly deserve. Having said that though, if I had traveled forward in time, my time machine would probably put your peer to peer networking technology to shame as not only would it have commercial viability, but also an awesome logo and accompanying pie charts.

Regardless, I have, as requested, attached a logo that represents not only the peer to peer networking project you are currently working on, but working with you in general.
Regards, David.

**************************************************
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 11.07am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
You just crossed the line. You have no idea about the potential this project has. The technology allows users to network peer to peer, add contacts, share information and is potentially worth many millions of dollars and your short sightedness just cost you any chance of being involved.
****************************************************
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 1.36pm
To: Simon EdhouseSubject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Dear Simon,
So you have invented Twitter. Congratulations. This is where that time machine would definitely have come in quite handy.
When I was about twelve, I read that time slows down when approaching the speed of light so I constructed a time machine by securing my father’s portable generator to the back of my mini-bike with rope and attaching the drive belt to the back wheel. Unfortunately, instead of traveling through time and finding myself in the future, I traveled about fifty metres along the footpath at 200mph before finding myself in a bush. When asked by the nurse filling out the hospital accident report “Cause of accident?” I stated ‘time travel attempt’ but she wrote down ’stupidity’.

If I did have a working time machine, the first thing I would do is go back four days and tell myself to read the warning on the hair removal cream packaging where it recommends not using on sensitive areas. I would then travel several months back to warn myself against agreeing to do copious amounts of design work for an old man wielding the business plan equivalent of a retarded child poking itself in the eye with a spoon, before finally traveling back to 1982 and explaining to myself the long term photographic repercussions of going to the hairdresser and asking for a haircut exactly like Simon LeBon’s the day before a large family gathering.
Regards, David.
*****************************************************
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 3.29pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
You really are a fucking idiot and have no idea what you are talking about. The project I am working on will be more successful than twitter within a year. When I sell the project for 40 million dollars I will ignore any emails from you begging to be a part of it and will send you a postcard from my yaght. Ciao.
****************************************************
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 3.58pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject:Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

****************************************************
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.10pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Anyone else would be able to see the opportunity I am presenting but not you. You have to be a fucking smart arse about it. All I was asking for was a logo and a few pie charts which would have taken you a few fucking hours.
*****************************************************
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.25pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Dear Simon,
Actually, you were asking me to design a logotype which would have taken me a few hours and fifteen years experience. For free. With pie charts. Usually when people don’t ask me to design them a logo, pie charts or website, I, in return, do not ask them to paint my apartment, drive me to the airport, represent me in court or whatever it is they do for a living. Unfortunately though, as your business model consists entirely of “Facebook is cool, I am going to make a website just like that”, this non exchange of free services has no foundation as you offer nothing of which I wont ask for.

Regards, David.
*****************************************************
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.43pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
What the fuck is your point? Are you going to do the logo and charts for me or not?
******************************************************
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.02pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

********************************************************
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.13pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Do not ever email me again.
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.19pm
To: Simon Edhouse
******************************************************
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Ok. Good luck with your project. If you need anything let me know.
Regards, David.
*****************************************************

******************************************************
As taken from the original post, written by David Thorne>>>

Kerala POLLICE !!

2009-12-07T14:14:00.004+05:30

None other than the Mr Kodiyeri Balakrishnan,Home Minister of my state ( 100% literate and famous for the Kerala model) writing it wrong in an interactive board during the Inauguration of Cyber Forensic and Digital Analysis wing of the Kerala Pollice..ooops I mean Kerala Police ....

Eye Test !!!

2009-11-05T17:02:00.002+05:30

EYE TEST

Look at the picture .........................

Have you noticed the girl in the background?
Noticed her bum? Well look at the picture carefully...if your answer is YES then go and see an OPTOMETRIST!!!

What you see is the shoulder of the girl taking the picture!!!

Oh !! wat a twist !!

2009-10-14T09:20:00.001+05:30

The story has a perfect twist !!!!

Tennis elbow !

2009-10-01T17:02:00.003+05:30

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Manmohan says to Lal behind him, "my elbow hurts terribly. I guess I better see a doctor."

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Lal replies. "There's a diagnostic computer at the corner drugstore. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten rupees... a heck of a lot cheaper than a doctor."

So Manmohan collects urine sample in a small jar and takes it to the drugstore. He deposits ten rupees and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into a funnel and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.

That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Manmohan began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, scraped some oil off the driveway and masturbated into the mixture for good measure. He hurried back to the drugstore, eager to check the results. He deposits ten rupees , pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

The computer prints the following:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her in to rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant...twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. Your Volvo needs repair.
6. And if you don't stop playing your thing with your hands, your elbow will never get better.

Have a confused week end people !!!

Technology in invasion !!

2009-09-23T16:59:00.002+05:30

with such gadgets in place, how long will it take the world to loose all its greenery ??? I feel really afraid to see this !!!

Shashi Tharoor and the Holy cows !!!

2009-09-19T12:00:00.003+05:30

Shashi Tharoor said a sorry and got out of the cattle class controversy… Now he has himself became one holy cow, now that he REALLY “understands the sentiments of people”, and will become what his party wanted him to be… a politician …

It is not a fall for Mr Shashi Tharoor for whom the current job (the union minister of state for External affairs) isn’t any greater than the ones he has handled in the past… The holy cows that he serve is a group of self obsessed self important politico’s who survive on symbolisms and token gestures..

What, otherwise will explain economy class and train travel for Madam Sonia, her son HRH the crown prince of India and their pen pullers and palanquin bearers given the fact that when they travel their many SUV’s have to be taken, seats in and around the VIP’s will have to fly empty, they fly only with kith and kin, chamchas and cooks in attendance.. How much money is saved?

What otherwise will explain the tokenism in this much touted economy class travel as if it is as pathetic as the general class in the ordinary trains where most of Indians stacked like cattle travel without complaints and ado.. ?

What otherwise will explain the large palaces on which out MP’s ,Ministers and the ex MP’s and ministers live in Lutyens Delhi, spending money on fanfare and their pageantry .. P Lakshmi, a minister in this cabinet wants new toilets in every corner it seems, Prince Jyothiradiya Scindia wants Italian marbles everywhere in his palace ( His reverence to Italy has no bounds really!) and Mani shankar Iyer, the EX MP and EX Minister is simply refusing to quit his bungalow…. People have dumped him in the elections and yet…why the hell should we the tax payer pay for his luxury living..?

What otherwise will explain the shamelessness with which each minister spends on 16 personal staff and other paraphernalia and no holy cows daring to venture to cut the flab, even marginally?

What otherwise will explain the sycophancy with which the palace cleaners like Jayanthi Natarajan and door mats like Ashok Gehlot jumped into the fray with jealousy and contempt (on the rise of the man whom they can but envy only) , asking for his removal and resignation..? How many politicians will dare to go around the town and tear his own posters saying "its a beuatiful town, I dont want politics to disfigure it" ?

Is it not clear why this is happening? Will our politicians ever learn to take concrete steps to improve the cattle class ( yes majority of Indians live a life worse than cattles and that is true.. )than mere sloganeering and absurd enactments of tokenism?

Holy cows!!!

Recession time banana !

2009-09-16T10:37:00.002+05:30

Recession has affected everyone.... even banana trees,,,,,,,,

The father , the son and the holy spirit ...

2009-09-09T12:25:00.003+05:30

The father who is the home minister of this state (called as God’s own country) his sons who are there in every news (most of them, bad and ugly news like land grabbing, mafia, money making, threatening, etc etc) and now the spirit of this man, named Paul George Muthoot, scion of the rich Muthoot family who was killed in the middle of the night by some un identified people…

It has all the ingredients of soap fiction… a handsome business man who is bachelor even at 32, traveling with some goons and infamous goondas in their car and his driver following in his, stories of a lady and a cash bag (which later went missing), the murder and the gang or goons (known as quotation team here in this beautiful state of Kerala,where gang of goons are available freely to engage, who can be hired if you want to terrorize, kidnap, attack, black mail, de captivate or even kill any one of your choice, if you know the sons of the right persons…) who were going to kill some one else, stopping on the road and killing Paul George on some trivia, the Home ministers son’s and their friends being dragged on to this case, the media probe, investigation, sting operation et al, the flip flops of the police, the IG going to the press with the now infamous S shape knife, which he said was used for the killing , even before the post mortem was done ( How Miraculous isn’t it? ) the drama’s, the culprits hired and paraded whose mother says the whole story is a hoax and the S shape knife was planted, the doctor who wrote the post mortem is said to have re written it and the depth of the injury has become smaller than in the original… (ahem ahem) …..

Paul is lucky -at least after his death his actual injury got fabricated to a smaller one and hence less pain…the arrest dramas, stinking tales of police and their bosses acting in connivance with the goons (customer relation ship at its best) …. The courts slamming the IG, the police and the bosses, their private and business interests that rule the state and its state of affairs and stopping short of asking for a CBI probe…..the police investigating allegations against its own deeds like “planting of evidence” ……how interesting …!

It is all amusing for sure, but more amusing is the silence from the dead man’s family… for all the investigation drama and ruckus, for all the mud slinging and riot from an equally corrupt opposition, the Muthoot’s have maintained a strange silence…

The actual culprits will never be found out for sure and all the media attention will die down…

The tale of the unholy nexus between the goons, politicians, police and the business men will go on while in the case the suspense is now taking an S shape…

NB:- I pray and hope that in this banana republic, I will not be given quotation for writing this... Amen !

Happy Onam !

2009-08-28T15:20:00.002+05:30

Onam is here and this time Mahabali, the legendary king will have to take some extra precautions....

Any ways Happy Onam Folks !!!!

Indian tax system !!

2009-08-18T13:33:00.000+05:30

Question 1.. : What are you doing?
Ans. : Business.
Tax : PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX!

Question 2 : What are you doing in Business?
Ans. : Selling the Goods.
Tax : PAY SALES TAX!!

Question 3 : From where are you getting Goods?
Ans. : From other State/Abroad
Tax : PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI!

Question 4 : What are you getting in Selling Goods?
Ans. : Profit.
Tax : PAY INCOME TAX!

Question 5: How do you distribute profit ?
Ans : By way of dividend
Tax : PAY DIVIDEND DISTRIBUTION TAX

Question 6 : Where you Manufacturing the Goods?
Ans. : Factory....
Tax : PAY EXCISE DUTY!

Question 7 : Do you have Office / Warehouse / Factory?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX!

Question 8 : Do you have Staff?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX!

Question 9 : Doing business in Millions?
Ans. : Yes --
Tax : PAY TURNOVER TAX!

Ans : No --
Tax : Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax

Question 10 : Are you taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?
Ans. : Yes, for Salary.
Tax : PAY CASH HANDLING TAX!

Question 11 : Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?
Ans. : Hotel
Tax : PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX!

Question 12 : Are you going Out of Station for Business?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX!

Question 13 : Have you taken or given any Service / (s)?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY SERVICE TAX!

Question 14 : How come you got such a Big Amount?
Ans. : Gift on birthday.
Tax: Pay Gift TAX!

Question 15.: Do you have any Wealth?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY WEALTH TAX!

Question 16 : To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?
Ans. : Cinema or Resort.
Tax : PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX!

Question 17 : Have you purchased House?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE !

Question 18 : How you Travel?
Ans. : Bus
Tax : PAY SURCHARGE!

Question 19.: Any Additional Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL THE CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX !!!

Question 20: Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY INTEREST & PENALTY!

21) INDIAN : Can I die now??
Ans :: Wait we are about to launch the funeral tax !!!

Swine flu scare !!!

2009-08-13T17:02:00.001+05:30

Its there every where , not the virus , but the scare... this but this the limits !!!!

Tributes !!!

2009-08-07T12:06:00.005+05:30

Great losses for the Malayalam filmdom !!

Peace, peace! he is not dead, he doth not sleep.....
He hath awakened from the dream of life'
Tis we, who lost in stormy visions, keep
With phantoms an unprofitable strife,
And in mad trance, strike with our spirit's knife
Invulnerable nothings. -We decay
Like corpses in a charnel; fear and grief
Convulse us and consume us day by day,
And cold hopes swarm like worms within our living clay.
The One remains, the many change and pass;
Heaven's light forever shines, Earth's shadows fly;
Life, like a dome of many-coloured glass,
Stains the white radiance of Eternity,
Until Death tramples it to fragments. - Die,
If thou wouldst be with that which thou dost seek!
Follow where all is fled! - Rome's azure sky,
Flowers, ruins, statues, music, words, are weak
The glory they transfuse with fitting truth to speak...

----- Adonaïs:- Percy Bysshe Shelley...

TRIBUTES >>>>!!!

A recession time interview !

2009-07-25T16:04:00.000+05:30

Interesting.....Don't miss last two Questions... Some, rather most organizations reject his CV today because he has changed jobs frequently (10 in 14 years). My friend, the ‘job hopper’ (referred here as Mr. JH), does not mind it…. well he does not need to mind it at all. Having worked full-time with 10 employer companies in just 14 years gives Mr. JH the relaxing edge that most of the ‘company loyal’ employees are struggling for today. Today, Mr. JH too is laid off like some other 14-15 year experienced guys – the difference being the latter have just worked in 2-3 organizations in the same number of years. Here are the excerpts of an interview with Mr. JH:

Q: Why have you changed 10 jobs in 14 years?

A: To get financially sound and stable before getting laid off the second time.

Q: So you knew you would be laid off in the year 2009?

A: Well I was laid off first in the year 2002 due to the first global economic slowdown. I had not got a full-time job before January 2003 when the economy started looking up; so I had struggled for almost a year without job and with compromises.

Q: Which number of job was that?

A: That was my third job.

Q: So from Jan 2003 to Jan 2009, in 6 years, you have changed 8 jobs to make the count as 10 jobs in 14 years?

A: I had no other option. In my first 8 years of professional life, I had worked only for 2 organizations thinking that jobs are deserved after lot of hard work and one should stay with an employer company to justify the saying ‘employer loyalty’. But I was an idiot..

Q: Why do you say so?

A: My salary in the first 8 years went up only marginally. I could not save enough and also, I had thought that I had a ‘permanent’ job, so I need not worry about ‘what will I do if I lose my job’. I could never imagine losing a job because of economic slowdown and not because of my performance. That was January 2002.

Q: Can you brief on what happened between January 2003 and 2009.

A: Well, I had learnt my lessons of being ‘company loyal’ and not ‘money earning and saving loyal’. But then you can save enough only when you earn enough. So I shifted my loyalty towards money making and saving – I changed 8 jobs in 6 years assuring all my interviewers about my stability.

Q: So you lied to your interviewers; you had already planned to change the job for which you were being interviewed on a particular day?

A: Yes, you can change jobs only when the market is up and companies are hiring. You tell me – can I get a job now because of the slowdown? No. So one should change jobs for higher salaries only when the market is up because that is the only time when companies hire and can afford the expected salaries.

Q: What have you gained by doing such things?

A: That's the question I was waiting for. In Jan 2003, I had a fixed salary (without variables) of say Rs. X p.a. In January 2009, my salary was 8X. So assuming my salary was Rs.3 lakh p.a. in Jan 2003, my last drawn salary in Jan 2009 was Rs.24 lakh p.a. (without variable). I never bothered about variable as I had no intention to stay for 1 year and go through the appraisal process to wait for the company to give me a hike.

Q: So you decided on your own hike?

A: Yes, in 2003, I could see the slowdown coming again in future like it had happened in 2001-02. Though I was not sure by when the next slowdown would come, I was pretty sure I wanted a ‘debt-free’ life before being laid off again. So I planned my hike targets on a yearly basis without waiting for the year to complete.

Q: So are you debt-free now?

A: Yes, I earned so much by virtue of job changes for money and spent so little that today I have a loan free 2 BR flat (1200 sq.. feet) plus a loan free big car without bothering about any EMIs. I am laid off too but I do not complain at all. If I have laid off companies for money, it is OK if a company lays me off because of lack of money.

Q: Who is complaining?

A: All those guys who are not getting a job to pay their EMIs off are complaining. They had made fun of me saying I am a job hopper and do not have any company loyalty. Now I ask them what they gained by their company loyalty; they too are laid off like me and pass comments to me – why will you bother about us, you are already debt-free. They were still in the bracket of 12-14 lakh p.a. when they were laid off.

Q: What is your advice to professionals?

A: Like Narayana Murthy had said – love your job and not your company because you never know when your company will stop loving you. In the same lines, love yourself and your family needs more than the company's needs. Companies can keep coming and going; family will always remain the same. Make money for yourself first and simultaneously make money for the company, not the other way around.

Q: What is your biggest pain point with companies?

A: When a company does well, its CEO etc. will address the entire company saying, ‘well done guys, it is YOUR company, keep up the hard work, I am with you.” But when the slowdown happens and the company does not do so well, the same CEO Etc will say, “It is MY company and to save the company, I have to take tough decisions including asking people to go.” So think about your financial stability first; when you get laid off, your kids will complain to you and not your boss.

Why you SHOULD NOT get Drunk?

2009-07-22T11:52:00.005+05:30

Micheal Jackson- Gone too soon !!!

2009-07-09T09:28:00.004+05:30

I have had my share of Micheal jackson jokes here and every where I write and speak... But when he is gone, when one looks back , when one sit and see the outpour that the KING OF POP is getting from all the corners of the world I can only but bow my head in reverence. It is not a simple task to be what Micheal Jackson was. No one could ever be him, when he was alive and no one can ever be like him even after he is gone. MJ and the innovations in music that he bought with him will remain...

What a life man ..!!!

And what a farewell !!!

MJ was .....

Like A Comet
Blazing 'Cross The Evening Sky
Gone Too Soon

Like A Rainbow
Fading In The Twinkling Of An Eye
Gone Too Soon

Shiny And Sparkly
And Splendidly Bright
Here One Day
Gone One Night

Like The Loss Of Sunlight
On A Cloudy Afternoon
Gone Too Soon

Like A Castle
Built Upon A Sandy Beach
Gone Too Soon

Like A Perfect Flower
That Is Just Beyond Your Reach
Gone Too Soon

Born To Amuse, To Inspire, To Delight
Here One Day
Gone One Night

Like A Sunset
Dying With The Rising Of The Moon
Gone Too Soon

Gone Too Soon.... !

Mayawati - the icon...

2009-07-03T12:01:00.003+05:30

Mayawati is an ICON , at least that is what she seems to be told and beleives...
How will one other wise ,dare to indulge in a self importance parade of sorts where she spend a whopping 1000 crore in a damn disregard to even basic rules of public behavior, installing and unveilling a host of parks( where the rows of Elephants-her parties election symbol and her statues are the key features) ostensibly for Kanshiram who founded her party and the Great Dr Ambedkar ,on whose shoulders all this jokers still piggy ride ....

Mayawati is a symbol ......and for UP (which sure is in shock for having elected her) and India at large have got this realisation that for us the need of the hour is statues... more and more of them... Manmohan, Sonia, Advani all of them should make their own statues and unveil it shamelessly and declare that ICONS should be said that they are icons when they are alive... No matter how many people still go to bed- hungry and crying , no matter the diseases, the unemployement, no matter the basic things like roads, water and right to education...

Mayawati is a synonym .....for the rotten politician that India seems to be bearing in its weak shoulders for decades now... and how we still arent tired of this creeps and the filth and smell that they emit... It is a disgrace that the world is discussing an elected leader of an Indian state and her statue fetish and other self obsessed traits of megalomania...

Mayawati is a gesture ....for us to act...... the people of India to throw the baggage and burden of caste and creed which for the political class (Class ? EH>>>> ) has been all along a tool for exploitation...

Has the life of the Dalits (bahujan as her party calls them ) improved in her rule?

Will they all get glory by this statue spree?

Will they get ecstasy when they stand half clad and half fed , seeing one of those statues, hoping to vote for Behenji again?

Will they get heaven if such bigots get to power again to build more statues and parks, have more birthday bashes and collect gifts, adore themselves in diamond ornaments and pretend like mideaval kings and queens...?

Mayawati is a Shame, an absolute one for the lack of even traits of humility that makes a leader, Lack of simple behaviour like the one Manmohan singh carries, Lack of mass appeal like LK Advani or for that matter the understanding of the issues of the common man that she represents...

The great Dr Ambedkar is made to stand next to her... Will some courts order at least the removal of them?

Paradox !!!

Let us keep praying, still....

a cheque!!!!

2009-06-29T12:21:00.003+05:30

For Health ??
For Mid Day Meals Scheme ??
For Education ??
For Housing Board Construction ??
Then For What ??

This is a cheque given by the Tamil Nadu Govt.....
to ELCOT for purchase of televisions under the free television scheme ??
YES ,can you believe this ??
What a total waste of tax payer's money ??

But this is India people.... it happens !!!

New generation Ramayan Narration !!

2009-06-17T16:49:00.002+05:30

A young second generation Indian in the US was asked by his mother to explain the significance of "Diwali" to his younger brother, this is how he went about it... "So, like this dude had, like, a big cool kingdom and people liked him. But, like, his step-mom, or somethin’, was kind of a bitch with a real mean ass attitude, and she forced her husband to, like, send this cool-dude Ram, to some real kick ass woods or some national reserve forest or somethin’... Since he was going, for like, somethin’ like more than 10 years or so... he decided to get his wife and his bro along... you know...so that they could all chill out together. But Dude, the forest was reeeeal scary shit... really man...they had monkeys and devils and shit like that. But this dude, Ram, kicked with darts and bows and arrows... so I guess it was cool. But then some bad gangsta boys, some jerk called Ravan, picks up his babe (Sita) and lures her away to his hood. And Boy, was our man, and also his bro, Laxman, pissed... all the Gods were with him...

So anyways, you don't mess with Gods. So, Ram, and his bro get an army of monkeys... Dude, don't ask me how they trained them damn monkeys... just go along with me, OK...??? So, Ram, Lax and their monkeys whip this gangsta's ass in his own hood... Anyways, by this time, their time's up in the forest... and anyways... it gets kinda boring, you know... no TV or malls or shit like that. So, they decided to hitch a ride back home... and when the people realize that our dude, his bro and the wife are back home... they thought, well, you know, at least they deserve something nice... and they didn't have any bars or clubs in those days... so they couldn't take them out for a drink, so they, like, decided to smoke and shit... and since they also had some lamps, they lit the lamps also...so it was pretty cooool... you know with all those fireworks....

Really, they even had some local band play along with the fireworks... and you know, what, dude, that was the very first, no kidding.., that was the very first music-synchronized fireworks... you know, like the 4th of July stuff, but just, more cooler and stuff, you know. And, so dude, that was how, like, this festival started."

The mother fainted...

Indian English !!!

2009-06-03T12:31:00.002+05:30

When T Rajendar speaks english !!!

2009-05-28T15:42:00.001+05:30

What Mahinda did and India didnt...!!!

2009-05-18T16:29:00.007+05:30

Prayers that he did, tough action that he and his generals ventured into and the act when got together, vanquished one of the most dreaded terror outfits and its autocratic leader ship which began with a cause but deviated and ended up in self importance and impunity with which it even killed and exterminated its own leadership....

Prabhakaran but would be remembered as the one man , who stood for a cause and made sure that the guys with he fought acknowledged the issue. Mahinda Rajapaksha on the other hand for sure would be remembered as the One man who finally did it, and proved that there can be no organisation ,however funded, equipped and supported from outside, that can survive, when the STATE has the will otherwise..

India salutes both the causes and I hope the new rulers here (OLD ones with the new mandate) take a lesson or two from the small Sri Lankan army who did the most impossible thing....

The Eelam dream has thus formally come to an end...May the souls rest in peace and never come back to destroy peace !!!!

Jai Ho !!!!

2009-05-18T11:23:00.010+05:30

All said and done, now that the dust and din is over....the latest Indian elections have thrown up the most debated arguement again. I have Just one answer to the question Is democracy doing good for us? Doing any GOOD for us?

YES !!! it is....

May be this election results, with all the ifs and buts of it, is going to be marked in golden letters in the history of democratic India as the the first decisive mandate (after so many decades of fractures & confused verdicts) that the people of this great country has given to Indian national Congress and its PRE POLL allies ( I put it in caps because it makes a lot of difference to choose allies after the election and cobble a mandate and winning with ones pre poll allies) and asking the BJP and its allies to sit in the oppostion again and learn more before aspiring..

The Left ( which is never right) led by the academic comrades like Karat and Yechury, in their fashion apparels ,drinking Coke and Munching big macs, have been shown their right place. The likes of Jaya- Maya- Lalu- Paswan etc have been routed.. (how I hope that the Congress will not repeat the mistake of roping in the comedians and criminals into its fold..

The likes of the DMK with the numbers and the increased bargaining power is poised to get more.......Cabinet Ministry for Maran(Karunanidhi's Nephew), Azhagiri ( Karunanidhi's Son), Kanimozhi ( Karunanidhi's Daughter) and many more from the clan is already being discussed.. if the old man from Chennai and his whims are allowed, that will be the biggest disgrace to this victory.

The young blood is poised to get more share of the power but that is yet to be seen... In the mean while I feel glad that the development will go on, the economic reforms and policies will take more concrete shape, now without the non commital left bargaining and barking from their support planks... I hope that terrorism is dealt with more sincerely and seriously, I hope that the PM comes out from Madam's shadows and talk to us, and throw away the impressions of being SHY and weak...

India rocks !!!!

Jai Ho!!!

The Royal oxen!!!

2009-05-13T15:51:00.003+05:30

A media report that caught my attention..................

Although there are various other scientific methods to forecast the weather and to determine harvests, Cambodians have their methods to foretell the future. Through traditional rituals that are often ceremoniously celebrated nationwide, Cambodians are warned of calamities, assured of good harvest and so forth. The Royal Ploughing ceremony, or Pithi Chrat Preah Neanng Korl in Khmer, and the Festival of Water and full Moon Salutation, know as Pithi Bonn Om Touk and Ak Ambok Sampeah preah Kher in Khmer, are such ceremonies. Predictions gleaned from these traditional ceremonies for the coming year are taken very seriously.

The Festival of Water and Full Moon Salutation is celebrated usually in late October. Drippings from burning candles predict rainfall distribution to provinces across the country. The Royal Ploughing Ceremony predicts the weather, epidemics and farming conditions. By observing what feed the royal oxen choose after the Royal Ploughing Ceremony, Cambodians believe they can predict a range of events including epidemics, floods, good harvests and excessive rainfall.This year, the Royal Ploughing Ceremony was held on May 23 at the Veal Preahmein Square, situated across the road from the northern perimeter of the Royal Palace.At the end of a symbolic Ploughing procession before His Majesty King Norodom Sihanouk, the royal oxen were relieved of their harnesses and led to seven golden trays containing rice, corn, sesame seeds, beans, grass, water and wine to feed.

The royal oxen chose to eat out of only three trays this year and because their feast consisted of varying percentages of rice and corn while they largely ignored the trays of sesame seeds, grass, water and wine, prognostications were as follows: Farmers would enjoy a moderate output for their rice harvest but good yields in secondary crop production, especially corn and beans. Because the royal oxen only sniffed on the tray of water and turned away from the wine, the prediction was made that farmers would not suffer any serious floods.
Every year, Cambodian farmers anxiously await the predictions at the end of this ritualistic ceremony, which they observe with strong faith and belief. Most Cambodians today still consult traditional manuals before making any major decisions regarding business matters or meeting important persons, etc. The Royal Ploughing Ceremony has been observed for many centuries at the initiative of an earlier Khmer king who had paid great attention to farming conditions of the people. Traditionally, the Pithi Chrat Pheah Neang Korl is performed in the month of the Khmer calendar and marks the beginning of the rainy season in Cambodia.

When asked, most Cambodians stand staunchly by these traditional methods of predicting the future and vouch for their accuracy. It is comforting to believe that the angels are still watching over us. As they say in Cambodia, long live the Khmer traditions. Long Live Cambodia.

Drama Politicians play!!!

2009-05-11T11:08:00.001+05:30

First time in the world history fasting only for 4 hours and that too with an AC…
This is the comedy of the year 2009….

Fasting starts after breakfast and ending before lunch.

Interesting one!!

Guess how low can the political class fall !!!

Gen Y...

2009-05-07T12:38:00.002+05:30

People born between 1925 and 1945....Are called...

The Silent Generation

People born between 1946 and 1964...Are called.....

The Baby Boomers

People born between 1965 and 1982...Are called....

Generation X.

People born after 1983....Are called....

Generation Y

BUT......... Y

Why do we call the last group of people...Generation Y ?

I had no idea until I saw this caricaturist's explanation! A picture is worth a thousand words!

Commercial Break !!!

2009-05-01T16:22:00.001+05:30

Vacation for my kids, leave and travel, and my brother getting married !!! this time I have enough and more excuses for not blogging !!! be happy for sometime until I am back !!!!

Recession & the Arab world !!!

2009-04-24T13:44:00.001+05:30

Now you have the reason why the Middle east is the worst hit....

A Paki ATM.....

2009-03-30T11:42:00.002+05:30

it could happen anywhere !!!!

If I was to be born again !!!!

2009-03-25T14:06:00.002+05:30

Men are Men !!!

2009-03-19T12:30:00.001+05:30

Nothing much to add... having a helmet helps.. thats all !!!

Another stupid Gandi....

2009-03-17T15:07:00.006+05:30

"BJP believes in integration and what we have seen on TV is unacceptable. This is Congress culture. This is not our culture. Yes! the BJP's image has been affected by his comments BJP has instructed all its candidates to integrate and we will decide what action has to be taken against him by party after his explanation,"

Oh yeah!!!! was my first reaction when I heard BJP leader Mukhtar Abbas Naqvi waxing in some news hungry english channel that celebrated the kiddo Gandi, the BJP Gandi who seems to have walked into trouble for his anti muslim rhetoric that sounded like lack of proper schooling spiced with the typical arrogance that runs in the family and served with ignorance, apathy and irritating jingoism that in one way or other have made the Nehru -Gandi clan !!!!

Gandhi they are NOT and Gandi that they are... Poor Mohandas Gandhi.... the clan so skillfully stole his caste name, and survived so long and flourished like a parasite on this ignorant nation.... have done everything, been scripting and enacting every sordid drama, feeding and breeding iconoclasts and terror mongers of every sort, only to get killed by them, showing utter disrespect to this nations fundamentals like democracy and federalism, and yet getting away with it, walking into power and behind the power just by virtue of marriage, as medieval princes did and keeping this nation primitive so that it remains under the spell… a group of geriatrics in the name of the clan ruled this hapless nation…

The new generation of Gandi’s seemed to be refreshing but they are proving to be no better… Rahul and Varun… one is the crown prince of India, self declared future prime minister who as of now is just a general secretary of the party which has been a personal fiefdom of his family since generations, but at the sight of whom the whole party trembles and bows and drags their feet in veneration …. From 95 year life long congress men to the neo rich and English speaking congressi, it is a pathetic sight that see or mention a Gandi, the fall flat.. As if the congressi Gandi’s weren’t enough the BJP too has got one in there fold, the young chocolate faced Varun Gandi, (son of the notorious Sanjay Gandi) , who last day spoke and spoke with impunity and insensitivity about the muslims in general of this nation…..he spoke so much so that even the hard rock and fire brand BJP leaders were dumbstruck …. The party is distancing himself from this seemingly Katyar in the making, who as congress men claim is a disgrace to the family (as if a lot of grace is left) and some even want to make him apologise…

Shouldn’t this nation be thinking , at least when we vote in this election… is this the type of leaders that we want…?

Don’t we deserve better behaving people to lead us than these idiots and ill-bred specimens?

How to put an egg in a bottle??

2009-03-14T11:49:00.003+05:30

STAR WARS...

2009-03-01T12:24:00.001+05:30

when SRK met Ishant Sharma....

Well Done my BOY !!!

2009-02-17T11:42:00.005+05:30

This boy Alfie Patten, is now topping the headlines and I am sure you would have heard his feat which is by no means what they normally call as CHILD's PLAY... at 13 he is a dad ... and that simply means at 12 he did it and when he did it by his on confession he didnt even know what would be the after effect...

“I didn’t think about how we would afford it. I don’t really get pocket money. My dad sometimes gives me £10.” said the baby faced lad who now has a lad of his own and he seems to be pretty undecided as to where to go from here....It is not new in UK.. The world record in this feat is still in the name of Sean Stewart, the youngest father in Britain who on 20th Jan 1998 , achieved the miracle through his girlfriend, Emma Webster.. For Alfie Patten his FIRST UNPROTECTED SEX happened a bit later, and thus the record remains safe with Sean Stewart,,, For UK it is a proud moment I guess....... at least in this the Americans arent able to surpass or even match them ...

The 13 year dad and the 15 year mom is supported by anti abortion groups, while some politicians and moral sirens have jumped into the fray with fury and furore... Pundalik is in jail as luck would have it.. one shudders to imagine what would have happened to the school kids in Mangalore otherwise...

Generation after generation its all changing... but is'nt this a bit too much? I am not shocked but confused for sure....

Now what,,,,? is the only question....

How to wash a toilet ?

2009-02-16T13:31:00.000+05:30

1. Put both lids of the toilet up And add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close the lid. You may need to stand on the lid.

4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'.

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift the lid.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, And run outside where he will dry himself off.

9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.

Sincerely,

The Dog

Valentines day and the pink chaddi!!!

2009-02-14T06:00:00.000+05:30

This post is dedicated to the HINDU taliban- the so called Sri Ram Sena (forgive them O Lord!!) Pramod Muthalik a seemingly fame seeker who is modelling himself on the other self styled cultural cops of this country like the Thackerey and his clan.The Sangh has now disowned the stupid gang, but people seem to be hell bend on teasing him to glory... Pink chaddi campaign is the latest and here I am wishing every one including this new saviour of my 3000 plus year culture, a happy valentines day....

Enjoy the day people, but yes have clean fun !!!!

Software guys.. the unwanted lot....

2009-02-11T13:15:00.000+05:30

Perils of a Catholic Upbringing !!!

2009-02-09T13:33:00.000+05:30

From a forwarded mail... It IS NOT MY STORY >>>>

As I walked down the busy sidewalk, knowing I was late for Mass, my eye fell upon one of those unfortunate, homeless vagabonds that are found in every city these days.
Some people turned to stare. Others quickly looked away as if the sight would somehow contaminate them.

Recalling my old pastor, Father Mike, who always admonished me to 'care for the sick, feed the hungry and clothe the naked,' I was moved by some powerful inner urge to reach out to this unfortunate person.

Wearing what can only be described as rags, carrying every worldly possession in two plastic bags; my heart was touched by this person's condition.Yes, where some people saw only rags, I saw a true, hidden beauty.

A small voice inside my head called out, 'Reach out, reach out and touch this person!'

So I did...&....

I won't be attending Mass for some time.

A story for relationships...

2009-02-05T11:57:00.001+05:30

A boy and a girl were playing together. The boy had a collection of marbles. The girl had some sweets with her. The boy told the girl that he will give her all his marbles in exchange for her sweets. The girl agreed.....

The boy kept the biggest and the most beautiful marble aside and gave the rest to the girl. The girl gave him all her sweets as she had promised.....

That night, the girl slept peacefully. But the boy couldn't sleep as he kept wondering if the girl had hidden some sweets from him the way he had hidden his best marble.....

Moral of the story: If you don't give your hundred percent in a relationship, you'll always keep doubting if the other person has given his/her hundred percent.. This is applicable for any relationship like love, employer-employee relationship etc.....

The three filters !!!

2009-02-02T15:43:00.001+05:30

Chinese English..!!!!

2009-01-30T14:14:00.006+05:30

Have known that English is bad in china, but could never imagine the scale... Indian teachers are much in need there, and in spite of all the teaching this is the case..

Or is it because of that?

Go Knocking !!!

2009-01-23T08:59:00.001+05:30

This is dedicated to my senior students who are leaving the campus shortly... This is my mssg to you guys and gals.. God bless....

Love u all !!!

India-Pakistan Nuclear war

2009-01-17T10:43:00.004+05:30

IF IT HAPPENS.. a hilarious mail send by GRC nair sir....Thanks sir for making the morning truly laughable,,,..........

here if goes....

During the Cold War, if USA launched a nuke-loaded missile, Soviet satellites would inform the Soviet army in 3 seconds and in less than5 seconds Soviet counter-missiles would be on their way. This wastheir scenario.................But if there is a nuclear war between India and Pakistan.The Pakistan army decides to launch a nuke-missile towards India.They don't need any permission from their government, and promptly order the countdowns.Indian technology is highly advanced. In less than 8 seconds, Indian army detects the Pak Countdown and decides to launch a missile in retribution.But they need permission from the Government of India.They submit their request to the Indian President. The President forwards it to the Cabinet.The Prime Minister calls an emergency Lok Sabha session. The LS meets,but due to several walkouts and sever protests by the opposition, itgets adjourned and adjourned indefinitely.

The President asks for a quick decision.In the mean time, the Pak missile failed to take off due to technical failure. Their attempts for a relaunch are still on.Just then the Indian ruling party is reduced to a minority because a party that was giving outside support withdraws it.The President asks the PM to prove his majority within a week.As the ruling party fails to win the confidence vote, a caretaker government is installed.The caretaker PM decides to permit the armed forces to launch a nuclear missile.But the Election Commission says that a caretaker government can not take such a decision because elections are at hand.A Public Interest Litigation is filed in the Supreme Court allegingmisuse of power by the Election Commission.The Supreme Court comes to the rescue of the PM, and says the acting PM is authorized to tak this decision in view of the emergency facing the nation.

Just then one of the Pak missiles succesfully took off, but it fell 367 miles away from the target, on its own government building at 11.00AM.Fortunately there were no casualties as no employee had reached theoffice that early.In any case, the
nuclear core of the missile had detached somewhere in flight.The Pakistan army is now trying to get better technologies from China and USA.The Indian Government, taking no chances, decides to launch a nuclear missile of its own, after convening an all-party meeting.This time all the parties agree.Its three months since the army had sought permission. But as preparations begin, "pro-humanity", "anti-nuclear" activists come out against the Government's decision.Human chains are formed and Rasta rokos organised. In California and Washington endless e-mails are sent to Indians condemning the government and mentioning "Please forward it to as many Indians as possible".On the Pakistan side, the missiles kept malfunctioning. Some missiles deviate from target due to technical failures or high-speed windblowing over Rajasthan.Many of them land in the Indian Ocean killing some fishes.A missile (smuggled from USA) is pressed into service.

Since thePakistan army is unable to understand its software, it hits its original destination: Russia.....Russia successfully intercepts the missile and in retaliation launches a nuclear missile towards Islamabad.The missile hits the target and creates havoc. Pakistan cries for help. India expresses deep regrets for what has happened and sends in a million dollars worth of Parle-G biscuits.Thus India never gets to launch the missile.Pakistan never gets it right.And we live happily ever after

Law is an ASS !!!

2009-01-13T09:40:00.004+05:30

This happened in a Chennai law college as recently as Nov 18 2008. Law college and this?.. well across India law colleges are notorious for such stuff but I guess this was too much considering the fact that a large horde of police men stood there, as mute spectators to the whole brutal saga where the law once again was proven to be an ASS...

Newspaper reports later said that some 7 "students" were arrested and the COPS-ACP Narayanamurthy and inspector Sekar Babu have been suspended while four Sub-Inspectors have been transferred out of Chennai, only to be bought back and reinstated soon .

Why the hell are we tolerating such barbarism if we are a civil society?

Raju Ban Gaya Gentle man,,,,

2009-01-08T11:19:00.006+05:30

Todays new papers call him all names... Ramalinga Raju and co as all the skeltons fall of the Satyam cupboards, as his ballon of lies burst, all his accrued vanity and accumulated fraud of debits and credits lie in the road, naked and exposed looks suddenly like another criminal, just another one who is a 420 case.....

HOLDING THE CHAIR TIGHT>>>>

It is a shame how he carried own , goes an old Boney M song and the auditors, the directors in the board , and others who have been part of India's 4 th largest software company, named Satyam (which again is the best of paradoxes in recent times) have to answer.....But do they really have to?

India is India.. it will go on and on.. and he will walk scott free head philanthropy organisations like the Byraju foundation of which again he is the chairman, get more peacock awards for Corporate governance and the same....

Will the same happen to Raju's team of liars and frauds?

India's corporate brand was by and large made by the IT revolution and now this bomb came as the rudest shock possible and that too at the worst time... It , as some one suggested in a TV show is done everywhere and if ever India and its loose neck government dare to inspect, almost all cup boards have skeltons that are just waiting to fall ... Skeltons accumulated over quarters...

Raju and the Q2 lies....

Q3 was no different.....
It was like riding a tiger said the man at his day of penance, he did'nt know how to get down without being attacked... Now he has gotten down... the tiger is roaming free...

Satyam eva Jayathe !!!

for all Mallu drunkards...

2009-01-07T10:36:00.001+05:30

Happy New Year !!!

2009-01-03T16:06:00.003+05:30

The less said the better !!!! let us Rock this new year folks.....

The kings new wife...

2008-12-30T14:35:00.007+05:30

This was a pic taken when more than 50,000 bare-breasted virgins vied to become the King of Swaziland’s 13th wife in a ceremony( some time back) which critics say ill befits a countrywith the world’s highest HIV/AIDS rate.

King MswatiIII, sub-Saharan Africa’s last absolute monarch, arrived dressed in a leopard-skin loincloth to watch the Reed Dance ceremony, which hehas used since 1999 to pluck new brides from the girls dressed in littlemore than beaded mini-skirts.

Wielding machetes and singing tributes to the king and queen mother, alsoknown as the Great She-Elephant, the girls danced around the royal stadium in the hope of catching the eye of the 37-year-old monarch.

"I want to live a nice life, have money, be rich, have a BMW and cellphone," said one dancer, 16-year-old Zodwa Mamba, who wore a traditional brightly colored tasseled scarf...... that is an amazing reason to be the kings Nth wife..... Now that was many years back... now the number would be more than 25 assuming that the RITUAL is going on....

The king of Swaziland for sure can be called FATHER of the NATION...

Why women should not be taken for GHAJNI>>>?

2008-12-30T09:26:00.000+05:30

The shoe game...

2008-12-26T16:21:00.000+05:30

The Importance of Punctuation....

2008-12-19T11:37:00.000+05:30

Dear John:

I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior.You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy--will you let me be yours?

Gloria

And now this....

Dear John:

I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior.You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be?

Yours,

Gloria

Application for Whitehouse Internship!

2008-12-16T10:37:00.002+05:30

An old one which saw peak viewership in the net during its times..

APPLICATION FOR WHITE HOUSE INTERNSHIP... ***********************************************

Greetings prospective White House interns!

This year, our program is heading into its 69th year of bringing America's best and brightest to the Nation's Capitol to help the "Head Man" do his job. We expect that 1998 will be the most exciting one yet!

Why, you might be asking yourself, do I want to be a part of this demanding, yet rewarding program? Check this out:

* Be a part of the action in the pulsing, throbbing political scene of the hottest city in the world!
* Get up close and personal with some of America's movers and shakers!
* See rooms in the White House that even a VIP tour won't show you!
* Get total access to plenty of sensitive Presidential activities! Sound like it's for you? Just listen to this testimonial from a former intern:

"I couldn't believe it! After only a few months on the job answering phones and fetching coffee, there I was, debriefing the president. ... Getting involved in executive branch affairs is just fantastic." - M. Lewinsky, Beverly Hills, Calif.

As you can see, being a White House intern is more than long hours, hot debates and touchy national issues.

Still interested? Fill out this information form and send it back to the White House at presid ...@whitehouse.gov

Name: Hometown: Sex: F__ Age: Measurements: (required for medical purposes)
How many beers it takes to get you:
..Giggly:
..Drunk:
.Hot:
..To lie to a federal prosecutor:

Quick quiz: You've always considered the White House:

a) a monument to democracy
b) the place where great leaders meet
c) vaguely erotic
d) extremely erotic

Hillary Clinton is a(n):

a) model wife and mother

b) icon of late 20th century femininity

c) an obstacle

d) inappropriate companion for the leader of the free world

You've always wanted to know more about the President's:

a) MidEast policies
b) childhood in Hope, Ark
c) romper room
d) "monument to democracy"

My social life as an intern would likely consist of:

a) hitting Georgetown bars with the other interns
b) reading, study
c) late nights working at the White House
d) late nights working the White House

Score 1 point for each a, 2 for each b, 3 for each c, 4 for each d.
Scores of 16 can start tomorrow. Scores of 12 and above, please call soon.

Uncle Sam (and Uncle Bill) wants you.

*Please feel free to forward this form to anyone you know who might be interested in this program. The White House is an equal opportunity abuser.

The Swiss banking Politician!!!

2008-12-13T15:29:00.002+05:30

The following article was shocking when I read it first.... and when I read it again, felt a pain from top to bottom of having had the misfortune of living here and enduring this nonsense..... read it and you wll know...

*********************************************************

Revelation of Swiss bank accounts This is so shocking.......If black money deposits were an Olympics event.... India would have won a gold medal hands down. The second best Russia has 4 times lesser deposit. U.S. is not even there in the counting in top five! India has more money in Swiss banks than all the other countries combined! Recently, due to international pressure, the Swiss government agreed to disclose the names of the account holders only if the respective governments formally asked for it. Indian government is not asking for the details...no marks for guessing why? We need to start a movement to pressurize the government to do so! This is perhaps the only way, and a golden opportunity, to expose the high and mighty and weed out corruption! Please read on......and forward to all the honest Indians to.....like somebody is forwarding to you.......and build a ground-swell of support for action!

Is India poor, who says? Ask the Swiss banks. With personal account deposit bank of $1,500 billion in foreign reserve which have been misappropriated, an amount 13 times larger than the country's foreign debt, one needs to rethink if India is a poor country? DISHONEST INDUSTRIALISTS, scandalous politicians and corrupt IAS, IRS, IPS officers have deposited in foreign banks in their illegal personal accounts a sum of about $1500 billion, which have been misappropriated by them. This amount is about 13 times larger than the country's foreign debt. With this amount 45 crore poor people can get Rs 1,00,000 each.

This huge amount has been appropriated from the people of India by exploiting and betraying them. Once this huge amount of black money and property comes back to India , the entire foreign debt can be repaid in 24 hours. After paying the entire foreign debt, we will have surplus amount, almost 12 times larger than the foreign debt. If this surplus amount is invested in earning interest, the amount of interest will be more than the annual budget of the Central government. So even if all the taxes are abolished, then also the Central government will be able to maintain the country very comfortably.

Some 80,000 people travel to Switzerland every year, of whom 25,000 travel very frequently. 'Obviously, these people won't be tourists. They must be travel ling there for some other reason,' believes an official involved in tracking illegal money. And, clearly, he isn't referring to the commerce ministry bureaucrats who've been flitting in and out of Geneva ever since the World Trade Organisation (WTO) negotiations went into a tailspin! Just read the following details and note how these dishonest industrialists, scandalous politicians, corrupt officers, cricketers, film actors, illegal sex trade and protected wildlife operators, to name just a few, sucked this country's wealth and prosperity. This may be the picture of deposits in Swiss banks only. What about other international banks?

Black money in Swiss banks -- Swiss Banking Association report, 2006 details bank deposits in the territory of Switzerland by nationals of following countries:

TOP FIVE

INDIA $1,456 BILLION
RUSSIA $470 BILLION
U.K. $390 BILLION
UKRAINE $100 BILLION
CHINA $96 BILLION

Now do the MATHS - India with $1,456 billion or $1.4 trillion has more money in Swiss banks than rest of the world combined. Public loot since 1947: Can we bring back our money? It is one of the biggest loots witnessed by mankind -- the loot of the AAM AADMI (common man) since 1947, by his brethren occupying public office. It has been orchestrated by politicians, bureaucrats and some businessmen. The list is almost all-encompassing. No wonder, everyone in India loots with impunity and without any fear. What is even more depressing in that this ill-gotten wealth of ours has been stashed away abroad into secret bank accounts located in some of the world's best known tax havens. And to that extent the Indian economy has been stripped of its wealth. Ordinary Indians may not be exactly aware of how such secret accounts operate and what are the rules and regulations that go on to govern such tax havens. However, one may well be aware of 'Swiss bank accounts,' the shorthand for murky dealings, secrecy and of course pilferage from developing countries into rich developed ones.

In fact, some finance experts and economists believe tax havens to be a conspiracy of the western world against the poor countries. By allowing the proliferation of tax havens in the twentieth century, the western world explicitly encourages the movement of scarce capital from the developing countries to the rich. In March 2005, the Tax Justice Network (TJN) published a research finding demonstrating that $11.5 trillion of personal wealth was held offshore by rich individuals across the globe.

The findings estimated that a large proportion of this wealth was managed from some 70 tax havens. Further, augmenting these studies of TJN, Raymond Baker -- in his widely celebrated book titled 'Capitalism's Achilles Heel: Dirty Money and How to Renew the Free Market System' -- estimates that at least $5 trillion have been shifted out of poorer countries to the West since the mid-1970. It is further estimated by experts that one per cent of the world's population holds more than 57 per cent of total global wealth, routing it invariably through these tax havens. How much of this is from India is anybody's guess.

What is to be noted here is that most of the wealth of Indians parked in these tax havens is illegitimate money acquired through corrupt means. Naturally, the secrecy associated with the bank accounts in such places is central to the issue, not their low tax rates as the term 'tax havens' suggests. Remember BOFORS and how India could not trace the ultimate beneficiary of those transactions because of the secrecy associated with these bank accounts? IS THERE ANYONE WHO CAN SAVE INDIA ?

To kiss or not to kiss...

2008-12-10T16:21:00.002+05:30

I know you will read this only once you have seen this pics ,still let me tell you what it is for those who have not yet got the mail as a forward. The venue is the inauguration of the Kochi stop over of the Volvo race and the lady in trouble is the Dist collector - Dr Beena . The kisser is one of the race participants who obviously was starved and the fact that she was a Dist collector did not make any difference....

India on the streets...

2008-12-04T23:18:00.003+05:30

Dear Prime minister...

2008-12-03T16:44:00.005+05:30

The following is a letter written to the Prime minister by a senior citizen living in Mumbai and which I got via E mail.......

Dear Mr. Prime minister,

I am a typical mouse from Mumbai. In the local train compartment which has capacity of 100 persons, I travel with 500 more mouse. Mouse atleast squeak but we don't even do that.Today I heard your speech. In which you said 'NO BODY WOULD BESPARED'. I would like to remind you that fourteen years has passedsince serial bomb blast in Mumbai took place. Dawood was the main conspirator. Till today he is not caught. All our bolywood actors, ourbuilders, our Gutka king meets him but your Government can not catchhim. Reason is simple; all your ministers are hand in glove with him.If any attempt is made to catch him everybody will be exposed.

Your statement 'NOBODY WOULD BE SPARED' is nothing but a cruel joke on thisunfortunate people of India.Enough is enough. As such after seeing terrorist attack carried out by about a dozen young boys I realize that if same thing continues daysare not away when terrorist will attack by air, destroy our nuclear reactor and there will be one more Hiroshima.We the people are left with only one mantra. Womb to Bomb to Tomb. Youpromised Mumbaikar Shanghai what you have given us is Jalianwala Baug.Today only your home minister resigned. What took you so long to kickout this joker? Only reason was that he was loyal to Gandhi family.Loyalty to Gandhi family is more important than blood of innocentpeople, isn't it?

I am born and bought up in Mumbai for last fifty eight years. Believe me corruption in Maharashtra is worse than that in Bihar. Look at allthe politician, Sharad Pawar, Chagan Bhujbal, Narayan Rane, BalThackray , Gopinath Munde, Raj Thackray, Vilasrao Deshmukh all arerolling in money. Vilasrao Deshmukh is one of the worst Chief minister I have seen. His only business is to increase the FSI everyother day, make money and send it to Delhi so Congress can fight nextelection. Now the clown has found new way and will increase FSI forfisherman so they can build concrete house right on sea shore. Nexttime terrorisst can comfortably live in those house , enjoy the beautyof sea and then attack the Mumbai at their will.Recently I had to purchase house in Mumbai. I met about two dozenbuilders. Everybody wanted about 30% in black. A common person like me knows this and with all your intelligence agency & CBI ,you and yourfinance minister are not aware of it. Where all the black money goes?To the underworld isn't it? Our politicians take help of these goondas to vacate people by force. I myself was victim of it. If you have timeplease come to me, I will tell you everything.

If this has been land of fools, idiots then I would not have evercared to write you this letter. Just see the tragedy, on one side weare reaching moon, people are so intelligent and on other side youpolitician has converted nectar into deadly poison. I am everything Hindu, Muslim, Christian, Schedule caste, OBC, Muslim OBC, Creamy caste...... only what I am not is INDIAN. You politician have raped every part of mother India by your policy of divide and rule.Take example of former president Abdul Kalam. Such an intelligentperson, such a fine human being. You politician didn't even spare him. Your party along with opposition joined the hands, because politician feels they are supreme and there is no place for good person.

Dear Mr Prime minister you are one of the most intelligent persons,most learned persons. Just wake up, be a real SARDAR. First and foremost expose all selfish politician. Ask Swiss bank to give name ofall Indian account holder. Give reins of CBI to independent agency.Let them find wolf among us. There will be political upheaval but thatwill better than dance of death which we are witnessing every day.Just give us ambient where we can work honestly and without fear. Letthere be rule of law. Everything else will be taken care of.

Choice is yours Mr. Prime Minister. Do you want to be lead by one person or you want to lead the nation of 100 Crore people?

Prakash B. Bajaj
Chandralok 'A" Wing,
Flat No 10497
Nepean Sea Road
Mumbai 400 036
Phone 98210-71194

These are our leaders..!!

2008-12-02T10:30:00.005+05:30

Not even a dog would have gone there had it not been a dead major's house.... said the Kerala CM V S Achuthanandan ,when the Major Sandeep's father threw him out when he reached there, with his dirty baggage of rotten politics.....And when contacted by the media for his comments, his office gave a terse reply: “He is not available. You can write whatever you want. We don’t care.” Now isn't that amazing?

Aise bade shaherom mein, ek adh aise khadna hota hai... it is common in big cities, that such SMALL incidences occur... said RR Patil, the HOME minister of Maharashtra... Hope Newyork and London is listening....And shouldnt we keep this specimen in some museum?

"Some women wearing lipstick and powder have taken to streets in Mumbai and are abusing politicians, thus spreading dissatisfaction against democracy. This is what terrorists are doing in Jammu and Kashmir,”... said the Muktar Abbas Naqvi- the Muslim leader of BJP which has left the guys in his own party shocked and red faced..... Contempt for the protesters and disdain to any one who criticize the ruling class and yet vouching for DEMOCRACY... Demons going crazy...???

And our man( he has now resigned and is now into full time modelling and fashion designing) ....see his boring monotonous speak after every blast in the past.....

Too late..Too little

2008-11-30T14:43:00.006+05:30

It is enough... much has been written about the Bombay carnage where a handfull of men came sailing and took India and Mumbai to hostage...The large army stood biwildered and perplexed, the fool who is the politician was as usual when everytime an attack occurs saying same thing, uttering cliches and playing games, the Manmohans, the Shivrajs, the Advanis and the Modis ... enough of this guys...enough of tolerating the incompetence and ineptness , enough of excuses and reasons that are tiring,,,, the politician is in his cocoon, protected and saved, in their large bunglows in Lutyens Delhi and he cares the damn for the poor man who die like locusts caught in a wild fire... I have written enough and enough and enough on this but this time IT REALLY WAS TIRING ... it was shaking, I cried seeing the visuals, I felt ashamed to call myself an INDIAN...I for the first time felt that if an army general could take over, exterminating the ruling class - all of them....

The police with under equiped and de moraled attitudes, the pay commission game and the redtape on in full glory,the army being played around, here chaos is celebrated with no shame or feeling of sham. It is disarray and not democracy. Human right watchers and the like who have all dissappeared, the Raj Thackereys and his goons who are not to be seen, and with no autonomy for the police, the NSG, the intellegent agencies who work as spy agencies of the ruling group, the system has failed this nation... romantic notions about our good old neighbour whose hand is evident here as well and yet we have no guts or gumption to book the people, and bring them to face justice makes me wriggle in discomfort...

Should India go on hot pursuit like the Americans is a debate. If allowed I will like to fire the ones who like to still argue on it. The intelligensia and the elite that has now woken up when their head was banged with the AK -47's will for some time now keep mum on secularism and human rights, but the Delhi politician will not... he has elections to play and all decisions will be based on that fact , ONLY on that fact and that is the tragedy that as a legacy India is facing...

The President is in Indonesia( holidaying I guess) and now as I type this, patil has resigned and his party claims that he has "resigned taking moral responsibilty as was always the tradition with the Congress party" ... Havent we heard even better jokes in the past..? This country is amazing...we some how have got immunised to this, even worse we sit and watch for 60 hours the nations elite force fighting a war to save a city and the country, when the politician on the street bickered like street children and yet think that it is none of our business...

Now that Patil is left the BJP calls it Too late and too little... Now that was the party which send its foreign minister with terrorists who where released after the Kandahar Plane hijack,,, the drama will go on.... the symbolism and will go on... the symptoms will be cured... the disease but will thrive....

India Shining !!!!

Fire Play ....

2008-11-27T13:56:00.000+05:30

Read first, then watch This is a dramatic video (30 seconds, very short) about how to deal with a common kitchen fire...oil in a frying pan. Read the following introduction, then watch the film...it's a real eye-opener!! At the Fire Fighting Training School they would demonstrate this with a deep fat fryer set on the fire field. An instructor would don a fire suit and using a 250ml cup at the end of a 10 foot pole, toss the water onto the grease fire. The results always got the students' attention. The water, being heavier than oil, sinks to the bottom where it instantly becomes superheated. The force of the steam blows the burning oil up and out. On the open field, it became a 30 foot high fireball... Inside the confines of a kitchen, the fireball hits the ceiling and fills the entire room.Also, do not throw sugar or flour on a grease fire. One cup creates the explosive force of two sticks of dynamite. This is a powerful message - watch the video and don't forget what you see. Who would have realised that a wet dishcloth can be a one size fits all lid to cover fire in a pan!!

The Men's rules

2008-11-24T20:42:00.002+05:30

Finally , the guys' side of the story. We always hear " the rules " From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.
Finally , the guys' side of the story. We always hear " the rules " From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!

Please note.. These are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

********** 1. Men are NOT mind readers.

************

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

************

1. Crying is blackmail.

************

1. Ask for what you want.

Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!

Strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

************

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

************

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.

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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

************

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both.

If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

************

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

************

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

************

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

************

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.

We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

************

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

************

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really .

************

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

************

1. You have enough clothes.

************

1. You have too many shoes.

************

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

************

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

Housefly!!!

2008-11-20T12:56:00.003+05:30

This is a cross post and was originally published in full2faltu where I write as a guest writer....

Gowri is just 6, my daughter and yet she has grown up to the world of ads and advertising. No shocks for me because next to her dads funny face and her moms tolerance of the same, the most seen thing for her was ads and ads only. When she cried (for no reason as most kids do) I showed her ads in my PC and she became contented, quite a satisfied baby. She beamed and giggled at the characters, their drama and expressions she owned and imitated with precision.
My best friend (who happens to be of communist thinking) accused me always of compulsorily growing her up as a consumerist neo gen kid with no real world dilemma. For me but, it began as a tool to engage my nagging child, later on what I admit got graduated into an easy tool to entertain her.

The allegation of making a capitalist doll out of her, made us (me and my wife) think of other kinds of amusements to keep her glad but alas, in vain. My singing was not that engaging to her, proven by the fact that she cried even more wildly and underlining my wife’s theory that ‘you are a good singer only for your ears’. Her tricks of entertainment didn’t work either but I never ventured or dared to prove any theory for want of harmony in family life.

At 6 this girl analyses ads more capably than her Dad ever did, and finds fault in most of them. Of course she does not classify them as BEKAR and/or the BEST but she stops almost close to it. And she does a better job I swear, in truly seeing the best as the best and the bekar as bekar. She has no axes to grind and no one to please or no point to attest. She is frank and open in her smiles, her frown and her admiration accordingly when and where an ad deserves it. The Indian consumer has arrived?

She was taken to school for admission a couple of years back. The schools of these days are in spite all the court orders funny places to be. If you have had been in one for a kid’s admission process you will know what I mean. They have panel of interviewers ( you heard it right.. a three or more in numbers panel) whose only obvious intention is to petrify the kid and haul out the parent does a wonderful job in sending you back with frustration, anger, apathy and seamless jealousy at the rich parents and their lucky kids. Mad rush for an LKG seat made me ponder as to how easy is it in India to get a seat in a B school. It really is if you see it relatively. At least the selection process has some reason and rationale…..

Her turn came and she walked in wonderfully valiant and unperturbed, neither by the panel inside and their spiteful looks nor by the frenzy outside and the din that they created.

Sit down.. Said the large madam who was over weight, over aged, over made up and looked over suspicious…

Thank you … said the little one making us proud.

They signaled us to sit as well in a sofa a bit away from the interview table.

I sat with ease of having got to see this drama where my daughter was the heroine (or villain?) and my wife with her heart pounding as if this was a life or death issue for the little one….

What is your name? The old man asked….

He is the chairman of the trust… my wife murmured…. How I hope she answered it right…

Gowri Raajya Laxmi .. the little one replied and my wife released a loud sigh…

What is your father’s name? Pat came the next question..

She didn’t reply… I stared at my wife as if it was her mistake…( the pun is not intended )

Heart thumping went up…

It is ok….. said the other man in the panel….

It is not ok…. You 200 year old toilet brush… I muttered to myself… I had taught her and made her repeat it a hundred times and yet… my girl…

What is your mother’s name? asked one….

She didn’t even think for a second before yelling…Laxmy Sabu…..

What is your mother? Asked the Madam in a baritone that would put even the Big B to shame….
Here, she got confused… WHAT…? What is what….

House wife.. house wife… my wife garbled in a pinnacle of nervousness….

Housefly… said Gowri and smirked….

WHAT?… The panel shrieked in unison…..

The girl didn’t answer, and perhaps the panel got the perplexity that bewildered the poor little thing….

Whom do you like the most?… came the next question…

I smiled… it’s me … its got to be me.. After all I was the one who called her all the pet names in the world… treated her like and angel vis a vis her mom who tried to teach her discipline at the age of 4.

The PUG.. She said with a loud voice and a large smile….

WHAT? Shouted the Large madam…

The pug… she repeated and looked at the panel, straight into their old eyes, with an expression that made them feel ashamed and wriggle in discomfort…

You haven’t seen the pug?… happy to help ?… she became eloquent and waited for an answer…

Well yeah,,,, well… yeah but…. The panel looked like a shattered army….

You know Bingo? She asked them

Bingo… my lord… yelled my wife as she pinched and punched my thighs angrily, hinting that I was guilty for this manifestation of spoilt behaviour …

Gowri looked sad at the end of the interview, not that the panel was not wise enough to select her but that they golden oldies didn’t know bingo… not even the pug… she was happy to help them but they weren’t ready to take it…they weren’t mature enough…

She watches more ads today and is in a better school than the one which rejected her for being what she was. One day I guess she will become an Ad professional, like her Dad who left the profession half way to become an academic....

One day….

the Washerman, the Donkey and the Dog...

2008-11-14T15:26:00.001+05:30

Old version…

There was once a washer man who had a donkey and a dog.

One night when the whole world was sleeping, a thief broke into the house, the washer man was fast asleep but the donkey and the dog were awake.

The dog decided not to bark since the master did not take good care of him and wanted to teach him a lesson.

The donkey got worried and said to the dog that if he doesn't bark, the donkey will have to do something himself. The dog did not change his mind and the donkey started braying loudly.

Hearing the donkey bray, the thief ran away, the master woke up and started beating the donkey for braying in the middle of the night for no reason.

Moral of the story " One must not engage in duties other than his own"
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.Now the new version of the story.
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The washer man was a well educated man from a premier management institute.

He had the fundas of looking at the bigger picture and thinking out of the box. He was convinced that there must be some reason for the donkey to bray in the night.

He walked outside a little and did some fact finding, applied a bottom up approach, figured out from the ground realities that there was a thief who broke in and the donkey only wanted to alert him about it.

Looking at the donkey's extra initiative and going beyond the call of the duty, he rewarded him with lot of hay and other perks and became his favorite pet.

The dog's life didn't change much, except that now the donkey was more motivated in doing the dogs duties as well. In the annual appraisal the dog managed a " meets requirement" Soon the dog realized that the donkey is taking care of his duties and he can enjoy his life sleeping and lazing around.

The donkey was rated as "star performer". The donkey had to live up to his already high performance standards. Soon he was over burdened with work and always under pressure and now is looking for a job rotation…

If you have worked in a corporate environment, I am sure you have guessed the characters of the new story.

Management lessons !

2008-11-10T09:35:00.001+05:30

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him.

They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well.

He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

NOW -------- Enough of that crap . . .

The donkey later came back and bit the shit out of the farmer who had tried to bury him. The gash from the bite got infected, and the farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock.

MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON: When you do something wrong and try to cover your ass, it always comes back to bite you.

The OBAMA speech !

2008-11-05T14:59:00.002+05:30

Hello America,

If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible, who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time, who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.

It's the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen, by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different, that their voices could be that difference.

It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Hispanic, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled. Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been just a collection of individuals or a collection of red states and blue states.

We are, and always will be, the United States of America .

It's the answer that led those who've been told for so long by so many to be cynical and fearful and doubtful about what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this date in this election at this defining moment change has come to America .

A little bit earlier this evening, I received an extraordinarily gracious call from Sen. McCain.
Sen. McCain fought long and hard in this campaign. And he's fought even longer and harder for the country that he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine. We are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader.

I congratulate him; I congratulate Gov. Palin for all that they've achieved. And I look forward to working with them to renew this nation's promise in the months ahead.

I want to thank my partner in this journey, a man who campaigned from his heart, and spoke for the men and women he grew up with on the streets of Scranton and rode with on the train home to Delaware, the vice president-elect of the United States, Joe Biden.

And I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last 16 years the rock of our family, the love of my life, the nation's next first lady Michelle Obama.

Sasha and Malia I love you both more than you can imagine. And you have earned the new puppy that's coming with us to the new White House.

And while she's no longer with us, I know my grandmother' s watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight. I know that my debt to them is beyond measure.
To my sister Maya, my sister Alma, all my other brothers and sisters, thank you so much for all the support that you've given me. I am grateful to them.

And to my campaign manager, David Plouffe, the unsung hero of this campaign, who built the best -- the best political campaign, I think, in the history of the United States of America .
To my chief strategist David Axelrod who's been a partner with me every step of the way.
To the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you've sacrificed to get it done.

But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to. It belongs to you. It belongs to you.

I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn't start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington . It began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston . It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give $5 and $10 and $20 to the cause.

It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation's apathy who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep.

It drew strength from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on doors of perfect strangers, and from the millions of Americans who volunteered and organized and proved that more than two centuries later a government of the people, by the people, and for the people has not perished from the Earth.

This is your victory.

And I know you didn't do this just to win an election. And I know you didn't do it for me.
You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime -- two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century.

Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us.

There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after the children fall asleep and wonder how they'll make the mortgage or pay their doctors' bills or save enough for their child's college education.

There's new energy to harness, new jobs to be created, new schools to build, and threats to meet, alliances to repair.

The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even in one term. But, America , I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there.

I promise you, we as a people will get there.

There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won't agree with every decision or policy I make as president. And we know the government can't solve every problem.
But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And, above all, I will ask you to join in the work of remaking this nation, the only way it's been done in America for 221 years -- block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.

What began 21 months ago in the depths of winter cannot end on this autumn night.
This victory alone is not the change we seek. It is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were.

It can't happen without you, without a new spirit of service, a new spirit of sacrifice.
So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism, of responsibility, where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves but each other.

Let us remember that, if this financial crisis taught us anything, it's that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers.

In this country, we rise or fall as one nation, as one people. Let's resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long.
Let's remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House, a party founded on the values of self-reliance and individual liberty and national unity.

Those are values that we all share. And while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress.

As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, we are not enemies but friends. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection.

And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn, I may not have won your vote tonight, but I hear your voices. I need your help. And I will be your president, too.
And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces, to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of the world, our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand.
To those -- to those who would tear the world down: We will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security: We support you. And to all those who have wondered if America's beacon still burns as bright: Tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity and unyielding hope.

That's the true genius of America : that America can change. Our union can be perfected. What we've already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.
This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that's on my mind tonight's about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta . She's a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing: Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old.

She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn't vote for two reasons -- because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin.

And tonight, I think about all that she's seen throughout her century in America -- the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can't, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes we can.

At a time when women's voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can.

When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs, a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can.
When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes we can.

She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham , a bridge in Selma , and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that "We Shall Overcome." Yes we can.

A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin , a world was connected by our own science and imagination.

And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America , through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change. Yes we can.

America , we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves -- if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made?

This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment.

This is our time, to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth, that, out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope. And where we are met with cynicism and doubts and those who tell us that we can't, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people: Yes, we can.

Thank you. God bless you. And may God bless the United States of America

Credit Crunch ...

2008-11-02T10:10:00.003+05:30

Diwali ..HUJI style...

2008-10-31T13:38:00.005+05:30

Even Bangladesh and its handful of HUJI guys can come in an create havoc in this great nation ruled over by eunuchs ..... Home Minister Shivraj Patil on Thursday condemned the serial blasts in Assam that have killed at least 60 people and injured over 100, even as he went into an urgent meeting with National Security Advisor MK Narayanan to discuss measures to control the situation..... reports media.....

Just one request sir... please carry all your apparels and shoe sets when you go for the drama... condemn them again and again but sit over the files ( which asks you to start action regardless of whether the terrorost is minority or majority)with your fat ass firm on it... shed crocodile tears... and wait for the next blast....

God save India !!!

Kids of new generation!

2008-10-29T16:45:00.000+05:30

Masala dosa Research !!

2008-10-25T23:55:00.002+05:30

There are many ways to eat a masala dosa .What ever the way one eats; there is a very good reason for doing that. It shows some hidden character traits of the person....

Case 1: People who open the masala dosa and eat it: These are the people who are very open about their life. Everyone one the persons friends would know all about him/her. I have generally seen guys do this rather than girls. Some people think that it is a gross way of eating but in truth, these people are just portraying who they are and how their life is.

Case 2: People who start from both end and approach the masala later: These are the people who like to wait for the exiting things to come to their life. Sadly when the times comes, they are not too interested or just do not know how to enjoy it to the fullest. These are the folks who just want life as either dry or exiting. They just do not know how to phase their life and enjoy it no matter what. There are two types of people within this group

Case 2.1: People who do not finish all the masala: These folks just do not care as much for the fun times as they are already brought down by the harsh reality of life. The dry periods in their life has left them with so much scars that they do not want to be really happy when the time is right. They just take only as much as they needed and end their life. A very sorry state indeed.

Case 2.2: People who finish all the masala with the little dosa they have: These are the folks who just are the extremes. They just go all out in life. No matter it is dark or bright. They may not enjoy life to the fullest but they sure make sure that they get every single good and bad thing out of life. Sometimes these folks are really hard to get along with. They are either your best friends or your worst enemies. They do not have a middle path at all.

Case 3: People who start from the middle and proceed to both ends: These are the people who like to get right to what they think is their best part of life. Usually these guys finish of the good portions in a hurry and get stuck with nothing but worst parts of their life. The thing to note among these people is that the tendency to burn out very early in their life. Like the above case, there are two kinds of people in this group too.

Case 3.1: People who do not finish the dosa: These folks are really the saddest of people. They are the ones who tend to end their life as soon as it hits the bad patch. For them, they only need and want the best things in life and nothing more. Typically, they are not prepared or tuned to life as a whole. They just want to enjoy from first till last. Sadly, no one in the world can live without even an ounce of sadness in life. Not even the richest of the richest. But to self destruct at the mere sign of distress is very bad. That is what these guys tend to do. Some learn to live life but most of them do not.

Case 3.1:People who do finish the dosa: These folks are the typical human beings. We all enjoy the greatest of times in life and push the sad parts thinking about the great times in life. Typically the plate is clean and nothing is left for fate or in life. Happiness and sadness are part of life and these guys know that and are kind of prepared for it. Life is not always happy but there are moments of happiness here and there.

Case 4: People who eat the dosa making sure that the masala lasts for the whole dosa: These people are very rare. These are the people who like to attain balance in their life. It is hard to displease these people and it is hard to make them really happy. They like their balance and are very protective of it. Sadly these are the people who tend to be lonely as anyone else may upset the balance of their system. Perfectionist to the core and are very careful. These guys do not make the best company but are needed in any group to make the group from going hay wire.

Case 5: People who do not share and eat the dosa as if it is precious: These folks are very protective about their life. They do not want anyone to come and interfere in their life. They like to hide their true nature and intensions for their benefit. Beware of such people as they are in every group for their own need and nothing else.

Case 6: People who offer their first bite to others: These guys are overly friendly. They do anything to be part of a group and make everyone feel like the group is important than the individuals. They are the glue that holds any group together. They are very friendly and bring the best of all the others in the group. They go out of their way to help other friends. Most groups should have a person like this and they are the ones who plan the group outings and other group activities. Once this person is out of the group, typically the group slowly falls apart.

Case 7: People who take one or two bites and then offer the dosa to others: These guys care about friends and friendship but they take their time to get into the group. They take their time in making friends and they typically are very committed once into the friendship. These guys like to always be in the side lines and typically do not jump into anything in life. They always take their time to analyze the situation and then make a decision. These guys take the better safe than sorry approach.

Case 8: People who wait for others to make the offer first.... Typical people I must say. They are unsure about everything. Even if they wanted to offer, they will wait till the other person offers the food first. If the other person is silent, so are these people. They are the followers. They do terrific idea, they will pitch it to someone else and get their advice before proceeding. Sadly, most of the elderly world like these types of people.

Case 9: People who offer dosa only when they cannot finish it on their own: You all may be familiar with these kinds of people. People who are very generous only when all their needs are fulfilled. These folks are selfish but at the same time not misers or greedy. They just want to satisfy themselves before they give it to the world. They typically do not stuff themselves nor do they tend to starve. They are very good people who would give you the best of advices in life. They would make sure that you are not sad following their advice.

Case 10: People who offer the whole dosa and eat from others plates: These folks are other extreme. They know what they want, they get what they want but they cannot enjoy what they want. Instead they tend to settle for other things in life which satisfies the needs but does not satisfy the person completely. These guys are termed as born losers cause even when they have the thing they wanted, they can't stop others from stealing it from them.

So next time you sit with a person eating a masala dosa, look closely and see if he falls into one of the above categories. You may be surprised as how much it reveals about the person.!

With inputs from my colleague Prof G R C Nair of IBS Kochi !